Monday, October 19, 2009

The hanting of the B. L. Fisher Library

After a series of tests, by the Weekly world News' highly trained Professional Supernatural Investigative Team, it has been confirmed that the B. L. Fisher Library of the Asbury Theological Seminary is indeed a supernatural hot spot.

there is a Poltergeist in the security system who likes to turn the alarm on and off at random, and likes to talk to the bats who get trapped inside the library. He is affectionately called Denise and has been known to pull books off the shelves. especially during collection shifting, one librarian talked about how it seemed sometimes He was just playing childish tricks and other times was trying to help.

there is also Leprechauns living in the many printers. these leprechauns have a tendency to cause the printers to malfunction and sometimes have to be reminded who is in charge. the staff have learned that by simply turning the printers off for about 30 seconds keeps these supernatural Squatters in check.

also found squatting in the library's computer system was a family of Gremlins who find the completed system of the library network a wonderful living arrangement and like to wreak havoc on the IT personal.

next in the electrical system of the library's lights there resides a ghoul who is always messing with the lighting, keeping some lights on, and changing the wiring so that the switches never turn off the same lights.

Lastly there is the mysterious case of the Richard Douglas paintings. it would seem that there are some sort of apparition locked inside each one. the most haunting is the one which is found on the bottom floor near an area called time out. for these mysterious paintings there is no explanation for the EMT that they give off. the Weekly World News Investigators are quite at a lost to explain them away.

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